Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Sleeping is just sleeping

I don't do "bedtime." I know the idea... All doggies know the idea. People make it really clear what the idea is. Bedtime is when people go to bed to sleep all at one time and want doggies to do the same.

Sleeping is awesome. I love (LOVE!!!) to sleep. It is one of the four most best experiences there are in the whole world (the others are eating until you are all the way full, catching a tennis ball out of the air, and getting the stinky thing out of the garbage). But bedtime is not the same, and not even anywhere as good, as sleeping.

The idea I want people to know is that bedtime makes alot of trouble out of sleeping when sleeping is so easy and good all by itself! Here is what I mean: When it is time for bedtime, Dad calls me. I have to stop whatever I am doing -- WHICH IS BEING UPSTAIRS, ALREADY SLEEPING IN THE BEST BED IN MY HOUSE -- and come to him. Then we go outside to the quiet pee place behind my house and I have to pee while he just stands there... There's plenty of room in the quiet pee place for Dad to pee too. But people only pee one at a time. So he has to wait until we're back inside, so that he's sure Mom isn't peeing when he would be peeing. So when I am done, we go back inside and then we go down to the bedroom, where I have to wait FOREVER for Mom and Dad to pee one at a time, AND THEN finish playing with the water in the sinks, AND THEN finish playing with the minty sticks in their faces, before they finally go to bed. Then they stay in the bed for a long, long nap, and, after the sun is up for a long time already, they get out of bed. They pee one at a time again. They play in the water again. And then that is when bedtime is over. It only happens once a day and if you mess it up you are done anyway until the next day. And all of that is way too much because all you need to do is just sleep.

And I want to tell people that sleeping is the easiest and best thing to do. Sleeping can happen anywhere, at anytime, and you can do it for as long or as short as you are asleep. You can sleep on any floor! You can sleep with your head on someone's foot! You can sleep in dirt and mud and while other doggies are running and singing and playing pee-ball! (Or at least some doggies can. I can never miss pee-ball!!!) Sleeping is wonderful and awesome and if you aren't doing it like this then you are ruining it with your rules and times that aren't about sleeping at all! WE SHOULD ALL JUST LET SLEEPING BE SLEEPING! Also if you would not wake me up to tell me it is my bedtime that would be the best.

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