Saturday, August 24, 2013

Smells like love

So apparently Dad doesn't just type my blogs for me. He reads them too. He says I won't need to poop in the downstairs because we will have "gadgets" to watch the baby when we're not right there. He also says that we won't need sticks or palm leaves to build a nest. But he did say the downstairs is the best place for a baby nest and that I'm a smart doggie. I like it the best when he says that! And then I started thinking about it more. I guess haven't met too many people-babies, before. But I know some things about them for sure already.

  • They can be excited and squirmy like puppies, but they don't work as good. They are slow, they don't move very well, and if they CAN get up, they fall down right away.
  • They pretend to like you so that you will kiss them. Then they sing their sad-angry songs right at you -- and right in your face -- so that you will know that it is YOU that they don't like. And later they fool you into thinking they like you again, so that you want to kiss them again. Then they sing their sad-angry song at you again. They are so good at it that you fall for it every time.
  • But they are also dumber than you would think. When they sleep they are quiet and look peaceful. But then they wake up and sing their sad-angry song the loudest, because they don't know what just happened.
  • Pretty much the only thing they are good at is singing their sad-angry song. They sing it when
    • There is too much going on around them.
    • There is nothing going on around them.
    • It is too loud and their ears are hurt.
    • It is too quiet and they get worried that their ears stopped working.
    • They get worried because they forgot what they were doing before... which was probably singing their sad-angry song.

But the most important thing I know is that they are soft and delicious and they smell like love.

Except when they smell like poop.

Then they smell even better.

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